Critics call it wasteful. While the anti-shredding community might argue that excessive shredding, even non-necessary shredding (read: recreational shredding) only puts more stress on the already endangered rainforests and tree life across the planet. Without trees, there will be nothing to offset our carbon dioxide output and release oxygen in the world. Were we to continue shredding at our recommended pace, the entire world might suffocate or insert Al Gore hypothesis here, the so-called scientists say. Yes, the man who belligerently claimed to have invented the internet and the very same scientific community that for years couldn’t find any definitive evidence that smoking cigarettes is bad for your health have teamed up to ruin your fun. So why trust science? Easy, don’t. Take a look at the world around and consider what a better place it might be if its inhabitants through caution to the wind, and shred to their heart’s content. “What good would this do?” you ask. Consider the possibilitiesNo More Court Orders Millions of Americans every year are sentenced to perform community service. Though this has been the premise of many a hilarious movie, in real life, it’s pretty awful. Not only is the service organization getting a volunteer without any care for their cause, they most likely aren’t getting Grade A work. To tempt fate and reference a paper-based operation, you could say their mailing it in. In short, court ordered community service is a waste of time for both the organization and the loosely-termed “volunteer.” Of course, the only way to verify your service is to have your hours documented and signed off by an official. If these pieces of documentation paper were being shredded faster than they could print, the system would collapse, delivering close to 20 hours of free time per careless misdemeanor.No More Paper Cuts Though not life threatening, paper cuts are terribly annoying, god forbid they find their way beneath a fingernail. Say goodbye to any sort of delicious sauce that will only make your finger sting as you wait several days for injury to heal. Furthermore, paper cuts, though they result in a nagging pain, receive little sympathy from friends and coworkers. No one will stand beside as you nurse your wound, rather tell you to suck it up get back to work, thus making the rest of your day that much longer. In order to occur, a paper cut needs a certain amount of surface area to work with. Finely shredded paper turns a potentially dangerous occupational hazard into delightful confetti, the perfect accessory to any office celebration or momentous occasion.No More False Hope Honestly, is there a worst feeling in the world than looking at someone else’s drawing or sketch and pretending it’s deep, emotional or logical? Ninety-eight percent of so-called artists are hacks, and yes, all of these hacks have close friends whose duty it is to tell them they’re on the right path and just waiting for their big break. Without the ability to sketch paintings and sculptures, most art would simply fall by the wayside, allowing these individuals to devote attention to things that either matter or are in some form quantifiable. Not to mention, the current art landscape is way too dependent on traditional paper depictions. Maybe your friend could borrow a page from the Subway playbook and try his or her hand at sandwich art, perhaps the most universally enjoyed medium. Or, instead of donning a pair of lens-less glasses and standing around while making up adjectives at the local gallery, take the time to enroll in some online classes (no paper required) and get a real job.